Nature was taking its course in my home, in my 10 year old son. His voice was deep. What is that all about? Could puberty be starting this early? I dismissed it and told myself he just has a low voice.
One day the phone rang. It was for my son. A classmate, a girl. He took the phone, looked at me with a look I didn't recognize. He walked to his room and slowly shut the door.
Something welled up inside me from the pit of my stomache. He just turned a corner and I watched it happen right before my eyes and noted the exact moment. It was the first time he seeked out privacy in our home.
...................AHA MOMENT.
The phone call that I noticed sent him out to the end of the driveway where he sat for what seemed like forever talking to someone that was to remain secret. I watched from the window remembering my times on the phone with friends and wanting those times for just me. I had no desire to share anything with my mother. I dreaded this time for I remember how it pushed my mother and me apart for a very long time.
But I wonder if it kept us apart because of how she handled it. I decided I was going to find a way that would be different for me and him.
How wrong I was!
I did not find that way. I was destined to repeat history for I had no role model and no idea what the right thing to do was. All my friends were single or just getting married. I was in unknown territory.
Advice and comments from family and friends -
"Children are innately selfish." "Boys will be boys." "You have to let him find his own way and make his own mistakes."
"That's a strong willed one you've got there." "He'll be fine."
Childlike innocence was leaving. Reality of adolescence and young adulthood was entering and I was alone without a husband.
I was a baby Christian single mother unsure how to handle a boy who wouldn't let his mother into his most private places. He wouldn't tell me about the things that were changing in his body, in his heart, in his head. All I could do was pray that God would protect him and pray I did.
One of the young girls that was speaking to him on the phone "so secretly" invited him to her church one evening. It was an event that would begin him on his journey to Christ. He came home that night full of excitement and awe telling me he was saved and had given his heart and life over to Jesus. I praised God and thanked Him for calling my sons name.
But now the battle would begin. The battle of the unseen forces that would fight to keep him down and work to cause him to fall away from faith and from God.
My son is now 29 years old and there are many things that have happened that I will continue to post about my son's journey and how God has used him Before my son was born God told me my son would be a warrior for Christ so as you can imagine we have been in constant war with the enemy trying to take his life. And mine. It's a miracle we have lived through it. But I have and so has he.
For now,
I can tell you there is hope!
Anice
No comments:
Post a Comment